Is there such a thing as Eternal Separation?

I’ve had so many thoughts swirling around in my head. You know from previous posts that I spend time analyzing and sorting my thoughts through writing. 

Here’s what I know, believing there is Eternal Separation is more harmful to our Spirits than embracing the truth of God’s love for all his children. What does YOUR gospel teach? It can’t be both ways, you must pick. IF you begin saying, “I believe this way IF” or “I believe that way because” …. be careful because you’re adding conditions to my question. 

Let me explain. In most religions, the ones I’m familiar with, there’s a belief there’s an afterlife. IF we live ‘good’ lives then we will be granted time with our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ and God the Father. We will live with them once more. Families are believed to be forever so, IF a family member strays, it’s heartbreaking on a whole new level, likened unto spiritual death. This happens on both sides. If a child strays from family beliefs, their fear of making this choice of forever being separated from their family, whom they love with all their heart is devastating. Even difficult family situations are better to live with than to feel eternally separated and alone. One major reason children hide their behavior from their parents. Fear of being eternally rejected and separated. What is sad is IF they stray, they’ve been taught they are bad, which is shame. Do you feel it appropriate to shame children into obedience? Does God shame us to obey? I don’t believe so, religion maybe, but not God!

Shame on parents for loving their beliefs over their child. 

Yes, that is a bold statement but I was one of those parents, so yes, I get this question and I’ve unpackaged it over the years. Today, I’m sharing with you what I’ve learned. 

Let’s talk about the word ‘stray.’ It holds the meaning of wandering, leaving the family to worry. IF parents feel they are losing control, because keeping their family members intact is what shows their commitment to God, the stronger they seek to hold on. IF they continue to stray and the parents or family members can’t hang onto them, fitting them in their family box of rules, beliefs, and attachments, then they surrender and begin blaming the person for wandering. It becomes their fault. The common belief is that the person wouldn’t have strayed if they cared about their family, etc. How sad that even has to be a potential thought! 

Think of the burden that destroys families believing in eternal separation. Think of the burdens parents self inflict by believing in this eternal separation. First and foremost, YOU are not God. YOU believe what you believe based on how you’ve interpreted the lessons you’ve learned. The religious beliefs you hold, and how they may or may not affect you and your family. 

I believe the most damaging is when we connect the word stray with sin. In a way, it justifies and gives us a way to make sense of how we must feel if something doesn’t go exactly how we’ve pictured it. 

During my search to understand, to gain some peace back into my life, to be the parent that loves no matter what, I read, “The Four Agreements: A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom” ~ by Don Miguel Ruiz

I know some would never pick this book up because he states in his first few pages, this is like a new religion. I believe he was striving to state that religion and gospel are two different things. Religion is the organization to create order and manage a large group of people. Much like a family, parents are there to create order and manage their household. The gospel, on the other hand, is the teachings we strive to learn that offer us peace and understanding in this physical world, those teachings that feed our soul. There are gosple TRUTHS and there are believed truths….I’ll get to that, I promise.

The chapter on what is sin stood out. I reread it multiple times to integrate the truth I felt was there. His definition: ‘a sin is when you go against your true self ~ who you are.” What does that mean? Again, I firmly hold the belief we are spiritual beings first, having a physical world experience, thus WHO we are is a spiritual being! When we go against our Divine Self we are sinning. Be careful here as well, because no one knows what agreements they’ve made with God as to their life journey. As a Divine being, we hold and have a Divine nature without any doubts or questions! Period!

When I imagine God’s love or my Divine Self, I can see the duality of energy within us much like a dimmer switch; the light and dark energy that we each hold, and whichever one wins is the one that’s fed. You know those switches that you push up to turn lights on bright, push down to dim the lights and if you pushed it all the way down, the light goes out. Let’s use this analogy. First, no matter how dark it may seem, the power source is ALWAYS connected, right? As Spiritual beings, your divine light can never, and I mean NEVER go out. It can dim but it can not go out. You are always connected to Source! This source, when you go against it is Sin according to Don Miguel Ruiz, which dims your light. How does that feel to you? 

Let me separate TRUTHS and truths as I promised for you. IF I asked you where the sun sets, what would you say? Would you say the East, or would you say in the West? Believe me, I’ve heard both answers over time. Your answer is going to be based on what you’ve been taught, what you believe, right? So if I said to you, both of these are wrong answers, you begin to feel the prickle to argue? The TRUTH is the sun doesn’t set, the earth rotates around the sun. The truth is what you believe. Big difference, right? 

Back to my original question: Is there such a thing as Eternal Separation?

The TRUTH is NO. We are here in this physical world to do our best with what we know and learn. The truth is based on what you believe. Be careful when judgment is made based on perspective! Nothing but harm comes from that, for all who are involved. 

Let’s ask this, so what happens when a child strays? What about a spouse? That child or spouse has come to earth to walk their journey. They’ve come to you to learn what will best serve them. There are no accidents of who cross’ your path. Not ONE person is a mistake or an accident! That path, I believe wholeheartedly, is a path of a Divine nature and no one knows what that path is except the person and God! Yep, even those who may cross your path who may have harmed you (click here for a good read to gain this perspective) AND when most people hear me say this I always get a question in response, “So you’re telling me it’s my fault I’ve been treated like this?” or “So you’re telling me I created this hell I live in?” That’s a topic for another post. Let me say this when you remove the layers of our psychological filters, the TRUTH is our manifested world is a reflection of the story we hold within, those inner truths. If you have more questions, please connect with me at Admin@jodykhill.com 

The bottom line shows straying is a journey, right? Going away from the herd mentality of obedience. Obedience to what? Family values or God’s TRUTH? Society’s perception of how relationships should look? 

Would you agree, heartache then comes when you feel your loved ones are straying from YOUR journey? 

I will send you off with light and love. If you have any questions, please reach out, my goal is to guide you to peace, confidence, and love in all relationships. Remember, this is a post to analyze where TRUTH is found and how it fits in life. 

The end result to this question is; It’s a Divine CORE belief there IS no Eternal Separation but our conditioned mind has created the fear around the idea, teaching, or interpretation of Eternal Separation …..

TRUTH or truth? 

{Blog: Waking Up~ on purpose} Living in Hell?

Why? Am I living in Hell?

Caution: This blog post is written to share vulnerable moments I had this week. Includes a thought of suicide, recognizing my on going feelings of fight or flight, and challenges with mental illness' within my family. I promise to share both, the good and bad! 

Here’s the BAD first: I walked out of my mom’s room today, she is currently living in a rehab care center. My mom suffers from advanced dementia which is difficult but along with that, it has brought up previous mental illness’ that have been undiagnosed.  It is heartbreaking and soul-crushing for an Empath, like me. My current situation is difficult for sure, but I know I am only one, amongst thousands, who are walking in this same painful path every day. Yes, I have emotional tools to use but some days I’m too exhausted to muster up the energy to use them.

Today I felt overwhelmed. I felt the heavy burdens I have been given. I think of tomorrow and doing my everyday activities seem way too heavy. I want to sleep, but can’t.  I want to eat, but I’m not hungry.

My flight or fight trigger has been ongoing for several years now, which has affected my weight and my overall health. I know, this alone is a significant contributor to feeling overwhelmed. IF I had the courage, I would walk away. My family is what keeps me from moving far, far away.

For a brief heart crushing moment, after leaving my mom, I thought if God wouldn’t take her away from this misery, I will take me away. If I ended my life, all this would be behind me.  During this, almost calming thought, I felt relief. I actually believed my family would be better without me. I would finally get some peace! I write this because I understand the importance of verbalizing difficult feelings and thoughts of suicide. Suicidal thoughts are a sign of pain, not weakness! I am not seeking help. I am not seeking advice. I am simply sharing. I know there is ALWAYS hope.

Verbalizing removes the power of secrecy! ~jh

My mental conflict: I beg God to take my mom away from this misery she is in, or am I begging God to take this situation away from me?

As I shared my feelings with a friend, they sadly stated, this is what I experience every day! I felt, really felt their hardship within their life. I also felt at that moment, the courage they have to continue living. My honor and respect grew exponentially towards them, at that moment!

Now for the Good: As I walked my dogs, thoughts of understanding began to appear. This is what happens when I am seeking divine guidance on heavy internal questions. I saw this definition on boundaries on FB, thank you, Suzanne Wagner! And it got me thinking.

Let me rewrite it to fit my thoughts towards creating spiritual boundaries. Boundaries between the Ego and Spirit. Boundaries are critical to emotional health.

Why? Because dealing with mental illness, or plain heavy emotional stress isn’t something we naturally make sense out of! We spend so much time striving to make sense of something that doesn’t make sense, that we go round and round until exhaustion becomes the outcome.

Let’s live smarter not harder!

A Spiritual Boundary is a definite place where the Ego tries to overstep where the Spirit resides. The Ego’s purpose is to STOP you from spiritual growth. And, feeling overwhelmed is the Ego’s way of keeping you feeling small, inadequate, and incapable.

Now onto the answer to the questions of how do you apply this into your life and how does this really work?

  • Why Spiritual Boundaries are so important?
  • How do I create a Spiritual Boundary?
  • How can I remove feeling overwhelmed if the situation doesn’t change?

Here’s an approach I invite you to try on…

First, it’s important to understand what is meant by Emotional Fitness.  Negative emotions are heavy, which is why we hear; (a) “I feel like I’m being buried alive” (b) “I’m trapped” (c ) “I can’t do this anymore”

Think about that, the more emotionally fit you are, the easier it is to deal with heavy emotions. We all get them, we all face them, but we handle them differently!

Second, our physical body is the vehicle that houses the duality of energy within, positive and negative. Our physical bodies ‘feel’ all emotions, good or bad. Good emotions that are spirit based, feel light. Bad emotions that are Ego based, feel heavy. I believe we came to this earth to experience how to build our emotional strength, to shine our light out into the world, and share love, for raising the vibration of this planet. Feelings, negative or positive, are brought into our lives for the experience.

Answers:

#1. Why Spiritual Boundaries are so important? Without creating spiritual boundaries we are like a feather in the wind. We go all over the place, without direction. Let me give you a visualization on how I see and understand the Ego, much like as a bratty, spoiled 4 yr old. If you did not establish any boundaries for this 4 yr old, how much confusion would exist? You would soon lose control of any control you thought you had, right? Well, I promise you, there comes a point when you say, “Enough is Enough!” and you lay down the law!  At least that is the goal, right?

#2. How do I create a Spiritual Boundary?  Change the rules! You must look at your Ego like this 4yr old child, and Spirit (your divine self) as the parent. Your Ego follows the rules Spirit has established and we wonder why life is filled with chaos. To create some sense of order, you must change the rules! Here’s a simple worksheet to test where you are now, showing you where you calibrate, weighing if you fall towards the left or the right? The higher the score or words on the left, the LESS emotional burdens you feel. The lower the score or words on the right, the MORE emotional burdens you feel.  Click here for the list of words from the book, “The Power versus Force.” 

Next, look over the words on the LEFT and write down the word that resonates the most with you, the one you feel you would LOVE to experience.

Once you’ve chosen the word you seek to EXPERIENCE, put it into this affirmation. If you are ready to take it seriously, print out this affirmation, then say it out loud as often as you can.

I choose to express my gratitude for feeling  __________, day by day, moment by moment.

#3. How can I remove feeling overwhelmed if the situation doesn’t change? You change how you experience the feeling. You shift how you process the feeling. Most try to stuff heavy feelings and not address them. They don’t spend time ‘feeling’ them.  A powerful way to shift and release the power of heavy emotions is by spending at least 90 seconds feeling the weight it holds.  Next, spend a few seconds thanking it for showing up. Love it like you would a hurt child. Then watch how you experience the gratitude towards this gift of understanding.

You are stronger than you feel! When life takes you down, remember, when you feel fatigued, rest!  Emotional fitness means you will have emotional fatigue. Much like a physical workout, when you hit the gym hard you get tired, right? REST!

You’re doing great! Hang in there!

Jody K

{Blog: Waking Up~ on purpose} Who are WE?

Who are WE?

I saw this and I thought of all our emotional challenges. Do we ‘suffer’ from feeling inadequate? Do we ‘suffer’ from feeling unworthy? Do we ‘suffer’ because we are stubborn or insecure?

All of these challenges are validated through our emotional filters, and those filters are unique for everyone.

Do they FEEL real, yes!
Are they REAL, yes, but only for you!

Do they validate you? NO
Do they empower you? NO

These challenges we suffer from are generated as truth when we nourish them by believing them.

To heal is to recognize we can not serve two masters. One master is the master of this physical earth, another is the master of our divine nature.

I am confident, we are spiritual beings FIRST having an earthly experience. We either put faith in our physical experience because it feels tangible, OR we put faith in our divine nature because we really KNOW who we are.

For me, to know who we are outside of any trauma is to KNOW our inherited DNA, that of a beautiful, illuminated, SOUL, filled with divine intelligence, love, joy, kindness, acceptance, and peace.

I see these ‘traumas’ as a gift, given to me so I may learn how to navigate through discernment and the Atonement to come out even better, living at the highest vibration of love and joy for me.

To hang onto these ‘traumas’ is to say, we are physical beings first, hoping to become a spiritual being.

Whichever view you resonate with is part of your path of life. Whichever master you serve, whatever vibration you choose to live within, remains up to you!

No one keeps you there but yourself!

I fully agree others may make it easier for you to feel trapped

OR

make it harder to connect to your spiritual roots.

Either way, please recognize the first step to healing is to ultimately KNOW it’s up to you.

At Jodykhill.com, what I’m really passionate about is awakening and reclaiming optimum emotional health. When you’re ready, give me a call!

#jodykhill

I posted this on Facebook on the same day this blog post was published. I felt drawn to post it here for those not on Fb. If you've seen this twice, this is why.